From the Desk of the Chairman of Mmouse Enterprises
Mmouse Enterprises Headquarters – Memphis, Tennessee
Tuesday, June 21st, 2022:
Earlier today the Interim Chairperson of BWM Inc., my imposter niece Megan, announced that my brother Benjamin had ceased all communication with the Board of Directors of his company as well as his aforementioned adopted “daughter”. Additionally, as part of this revelation, Megan revealed that the EWA was now effectively “dead” and that it will be replaced with the new company “All Elite Wrestling” starting with this week’s WOW Draft.
This shocking news came hours after the company announced the release of some bright new stars in the business, including hot new prospects “Hangman” Adam Page, the Lucha Brothers, and Hikaru Shida. What’s mind-boggling about these releases is that none of these stars ever had a chance to showcase their tremendous talent due to the instability of their now-former “employer”. They were simply plucked out of the independent scene last summer by the EWA for the purpose of preventing myself from negotiating contracts with them.
Let’s start by addressing the superstars that I just highlighted. I took note of these four specific releases because Mmouse Enterprises has officially entered into contractual negotiations with all four with the intention of hiring each. One thing you can count on with Mmouse Enterprises is that we actually follow through with our contracts to the best of our ability without becoming little more than a company selling t-shirts for wrestling marks.
Make no mistake about it: the EWA has become a T-Shirt company. It exists in name only for fanboys and fangirls of outlaw wrestling nerds, which is by and large why they have and profit from a loyal cult-like following each and every time they make a guest appearance in my industry. Playing musical chairs with the letters in your acronym will not change what’s wrong at the core of BWM Inc.’s “business model”.
What’s wrong at the core? Simply put, they are not interested in running a business, but rather they are looking for the momentary satisfaction of becoming a fad, an entertainment fling, if you will. The casual viewer tunes in when they see a familiar face, because BWM Inc. excels at the nostalgia almost as well as we do. People love a trip down memory lane, but the real problem with the company is one that overshadows all of its perceived strengths. That problem is the lack of consistency and longevity.
Megan may well prove to be a better promoter than my brother, but she was still raised by him and that doesn’t bode well for any readers and listeners hoping that her taking the reins will indicate a true shift in the fate of the “elite”.
So, go ahead, boys and girls of mark-land. The EWA has become AEW and those of you who have bought into this con over the past 14 years since the EWA was first introduced will probably have no problem buying into this latest dog and pony show.
In closing, while I attempt to work out the schedule of Mmouse Enterprises with HCW programming involved (and there will be a major overhaul of the schedule announced after the draft) I will submit a petition to the Securities and Exchange Commission for Benjamin’s removal – citing his dangerous unreliability and recent disappearance – as a shareholder of my company so as to make those shares available for a worthy investor.
Until next time,
Mickey M. Mouse Junior
Chairman & Owner – Mmouse Enterprises