SEGMENT ONE
As the opening video concludes and the pyro explodes, Arn Anderson and Kevin Kelly welcome us back to Chaos, promising a supersized show in lieu of Monday’s canceled episode of Dynamite. Anderson explains that Monday’s Dynamite was scheduled to come at us live from Houston, but the show was canceled at the last moment due to the impending arrival of Hurricane Francine. Kelly says the hurricane narrowly avoided Texas, but BWM Inc. takes every precaution to ensure the safety of our fans and performers.
Commentary is interrupted by the unmistakable sounds of MJF’s music, as the former AEW World Heavyweight Champion makes his way to the ring to a massive response from the audience. Commentary notes that this is the first we’ve seen of MJF since he shocked the world, decimating the 800-pound monster Armageddon at Aftershock.
Arn Anderson: It’s notable to point out that MJF is on his way to the ring alone. No Wardlow, no Scott Steiner, no Logan Paul. Makes you wonder what’s going on in MJF’s mind right now.
Wrapped in his signature Burberry scarf, MJF steps through the ropes, his face serious and intense. He grabs a microphone.
MJF: Cut my music.
The music abruptly stops as MJF takes his place in the center of the ring, addressing the hard cam.
MJF: This week, I got a call from a voice so distorted, I swear it sounded just like Benny Mouse after a rough night at the asylum.
MJF: Now, normally, I wouldn’t give the time of day to some raving lunatic calling me in the middle of my perfectly scheduled life. But this time? This time, the voice said something interesting. It said I’ve been guaranteed a spot in the 60-man, three-ring battle royal at Extreme Warfare for the AEW World Heavyweight Championship.
The crowd pops, but MJF’s expression remains unchanged as he continues.
MJF: You see, ever since Retribution, I’ve been naked.
The crowd murmurs as some women in the audience hoot and holler.
MJF: No, I don’t mean physically, you degenerates. I mean, I’ve been stripped of the only thing that matters in this business—my AEW World Heavyweight Championship. The title that Sami Zayn stole from me!
The mention of Sami Zayn draws loud boos from the audience.
MJF: And since that day, since that moment where Sami Zayn stole everything from me, he’s been ducking me. Oh yeah, Mr. Chairman of BWM Inc., Mr. ‘I run AEW now,’ has made sure to avoid giving me my contractually obligated rematch. But Sami? Your time is running out. And believe me, when I get my hands on you, it won’t just be about a title anymore. It’ll be about revenge.
MJF lowers the microphone, the venom in his voice apparent as the crowd chants “M-J-F.”
Suddenly, the arena lights shift and Will Ospreay’s music hits, sending the crowd into a frenzy. Ospreay appears at the top of the ramp, grinning as he surveys the scene. He walks down the ramp with confidence, acknowledging the massive pop before sliding into the ring. The tension rises as MJF and Will Ospreay stand face to face for the first time ever.
Will Ospreay: Sorry for the interruption, but I haven’t had the chance to properly introduce myself to you, mate.
Ospreay smirks, stepping closer to MJF. He extends his hand, but MJF doesn’t react.
Will Ospreay: And what an introduction this is, huh? The great MJF, talking about revenge and stolen titles. But you see, bruv, I’m on a little quest of my own, and you… you just happen to be on my list.
MJF raises an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed.
MJF: What, you want an autograph or something? Let me guess—you’re here to tell me you respect me, right? Well, congratu-fucking-lations, because I don’t even know who you are.
The crowd gasps at MJF’s blatant dismissal of Ospreay, but to his credit, the Aerial Assassin remains calm, a slight smirk creeping across his face.
Will Ospreay: Oh, respect? Yeah, I do respect you, Max. But here’s the thing—you’re the last former world champion on my list. See, I beat Bryan Danielson, and AJ Styles? Well, he’s gone off into the sunset. That leaves you.
Will Ospreay: So, how about a little side quest, eh? You and me, two weeks, Dynamite. Let’s find out if you’re really as good as you say you are… or if deep down, you know I’m better than you!
MJF looks taken aback for a brief moment before quickly recovering, laughing into the mic.
MJF: You think you’re better than me? You think just because you beat a few people who are past their prime, that makes you special? Nah, mate, it makes you delusional. But I’ll tell you what—I’d be happy to put you in your place in two weeks.
Ospreay steps closer, getting nose to nose with MJF. The crowd is on the edge of their seats, sensing a fight is about to break out.
Will Ospreay: We’ll see about that.
MJF stares back, the smirk fading slightly as the tension escalates. Just as it looks like they’re about to come to blows, MJF suddenly steps back, his smirk returning.
MJF: Yeah, we’ll see. But do you know what I think? I think you’re going to regret this moment for a very long time to come.
With that, MJF lowers his mic and backs out of the ring, still smirking as he exits up the ramp. Ospreay watches him leave as the crowd chants “This is awesome!”
Kevin Kelly: Two of the best in the world, Arn, and it looks like we’re in for one hell of a collision in two weeks!
Arn Anderson: It’s going to be a helluva match, Kev. But I’ve got to wonder about Ospreay’s strategy. MJF has been at new levels of violence and destruction since losing that championship, and I’m not sure that Ospreay’s taking that into account.
The camera lingers on Ospreay in the ring as MJF disappears through the curtain as the scene fades.
Backstage, AEW Correspondent Taz stands in front of the AEW backdrop, microphone in hand, as the camera zooms in.
Taz: Ladies and gentlemen, I’m standing by with the AEW Television Champion, the Ring General himself, Gunther.
The camera pulls back, revealing Gunther standing tall, the AEW TV Championship draped over his shoulder.
Taz: Gunther, last Friday on Chaos, we saw the cold-hearted handsome devil, Hook, make his intentions known when he confronted you and your associate, Ludwig Kaiser. Now, from where I’m standing, it looked like you managed to slip away, but Kaiser… not so lucky.
Gunther adjusts the championship on his shoulder as he takes a step towards Taz.
Gunther: Biased. You’re biased, Taz. You’re not a journalist—you’re Hook’s father, and you’re no different than any other blind fool who watches this circus and calls it sport.
Taz: Whoa, whoa—hold on now. Biased? You want to talk biased? How can you stand here and say that when you yourself brutalized Brock Lesnar at Aftershock?
Gunther sneers, clearly annoyed at Taz’s question. He tightens his grip on the title as the tension between the two men builds.
Gunther: This nonsense! I have no time for it.
Gunther nods to something off screen, but Taz doesn’t notice.
Taz: Look, I’m just trying to do my jo—
Suddenly, Ludwig Kaiser emerges, swinging a steel chair across the back of Taz’s head. Taz crumples to the ground, groaning in pain. The camera zooms in on Gunther, who remains calm as chaos erupts.
Gunther picks Taz up by his shirt, disgust washing over his face as he tosses the veteran through the interview backdrop! Taz crashes through it, leaving a gaping hole in the set as he lands on a pile of production equipment.
Kaiser stands over at Taz, glaring down at him as Gunther steps forward, picking up the microphone that Taz dropped. He holds it up to his mouth, looking directly into the camera.
Gunther: Hook… you want me? You can find me anyplace, any time.
Gunther tosses the mic aside, the clatter echoing through the hallway as he and Kaiser walk off, leaving Taz lying motionless amid the wreckage of the backdrop.
Match #1 | Exhibition Match
‘Jungle Boy’ Jack Perry w/ Luchasaurus vs. Darby Allin
As the competitors make their way to the ring, Arn Anderson and Kevin Kelly discuss the stakes of this match with two superstars who have become to be known as “AEW Originals,” though both began their career in Murrey Entertainment.
Arn Anderson: The daredevil Darby Allin has suffered a string of tough losses since the end of last season, including the loss of his friend, mentor, and tag team partner Sting. Jungle Boy himself has had a tough time finding his footing in AEW, and recently we saw him snap on his tag partner Luchasaurus. This match tonight is about more than bragging rights; it’s a chance for both men to breakout and move up in the rankings in the singles division.
As the bell sounds, the two competitors stand toe-to-toe in the center of the ring, staring one another down before they circle, finally locking up.
In the tie-up, Darby forces Perry into the corner, but instead of a clean break, he shoves Jungle Boy, taunting him. Frustrated, Perry calls for the lockup once more, but as they lock hands Darby sweeps Jungle Boy’s legs, dropping him to the mat and immediately going for a cover.
1…
No! Jungle Boy kicks out with ease, but Allin is again on the offensive, rolling him up with a crucifix.
1…
Perry kicks out again, as Luchasaurus tries to get the crowd behind Perry, but fails to have much luck, as the fans recall Perry’s treatment of Luchasaurus as of late.
Kevin Kelly: Darby’s wrestling a smart match here, keeping Jungle Boy grounded. But this new attitude of Jungle Boy has me worried. Luchasaurus is out there looking like he’s got Stockholm Syndrome.
Allin catches Jungle Boy with a side headlock, taking him back down to the mat. Perry fights back to his feet, hitting the ropes, but Darby refuses to release the headlock, dragging Jungle Boy back down to the canvas. Perry, undeterred, rolls Darby into a pin attempt!
1…
This time it’s Darby who kicks out after the one count!
Darby escapes and resets as Jungle Boy goes for a whip, sending Darby into the ropes. Darby leaps over his back, but Jungle Boy answers with a side headlock takedown into a deep arm drag.
Arn Anderson: Fast-paced action from the start, but Jungle Boy’s showing he can keep up with Darby’s speed.
Jungle Boy picks the heel, looking for his Snare Trap submission hold. However, Darby grabs the bottom rope almost immediately, infuriating Perry. Darby unleashes a barrage of punches, and Jungle Boy rolls to the outside for a breather.
As Jungle Boy’s on the outside catching his breath, Allin ascends to the top rope and flies after him with a senton, as both men crash hard on the outside! Allin rolls him back in the ring and charges at him, catching him with the Code Red piledriver for two!
Luchasaurus jumps onto the apron, causing referee Lance Storm to divert his attention. Jungle Boy uses this opportunity to catch Allin with a low-blow, before following up with a belly to belly suplex, and then a vicious German suplex!
He bridges through the suplex into a cover Allin just as Storm turns around and Luchasaurus hops off the apron.
1…
2…
Darby kicks out, but Perry keeps the pressure on, this time transitioning into a tiger suplex and another quick pin attempt!
1… 2…
Darby escapes again! Out of nowhere, he catches Perry off guard and hits him with a stunner! Now Darby covers.
1… 2…!
Kevin Kelly: That stunner nearly had him!
Darby, regaining momentum, charges into the corner with a running uppercut, then follows with a full-force Coffin Splash. He goes for a third, but Perry counters, locking his legs around Darby’s waist and slamming him head-first into the mat. Perry tosses him to the outside, and hits the ropes and dives through with a suicide dive! He doesn’t stop there—he gets back into the ring and hits a second dive! Allin is still somehow standing. On the third attempt, Jungle Boy flies over the top rope with a twisting flip, wiping out Darby!
Kevin Kelly: Unbelievable athleticism from Jungle Boy! He’s flying all over the place!
Jungle Boy goes to get back into the ring, but on the apron Allin hits the leg sweep. He grabs Jungle Boy by the hair and chokes him against the bottom rope, using the referee’s count to his advantage. With a devilish grin, and Perry fazed on the apron, Allin climbs to the top rope and hits a Coffin Drop on the apron!
Both men crash to the floor as we get our second, “This is awesome chant” of the evening in quick order. Lance Storm is at a seven count before Darby Allin rolls into the ring. Just as Storm is about to reach 10, Luchasaurus picks Jungle Boy up, shakes him awake, and tosses him back into the ring to avoid the count out!
Arn Anderson: Luchasaurus with the save for Jungle Boy!
Back in the ring, Allin drills Jungle Boy with the diving cross body just as he’s beginning to get his wits about him. Darby whips him into the ropes and Perry flies back with a clothesline! He lifts Darby up, drilling him to the mat with a brainbuster!
He covers again, but again Allin kicks out just short of three! As Allin gets to his feet, Perry connects with a running elbow to the back of his head, covering him once more!
1…
2…
2.999!
Another kick out! Jungle Boy locks in the Snare Trap, pulling Darby to the center of the ring. Darby stretches desperately for the ropes, and just as he’s about to tap, he manages to grab the bottom rope to force a break!
Kevin Kelly: Darby Allin survives, but just barely! How much more can he take?
Jungle Boy repositions, transitioning into a Mexican Surfboard. He stretches Darby to his breaking point before rolling him into a second Snare Trap! Darby claws at Perry’s face, forcing the hold to be broken. Jungle Boy snaps, delivering a brutal slap to Darby’s ear, followed by a flurry of punches.
Arn Anderson: This is that new side of Jungle Boy I was talking about earlier… he’s ruthless, he’s aggressive, and it’s working!
Darby fights back, reversing a whip into the ropes, going for a Sunset Flip, but Jungle Boy rolls through! Darby counters with The Last Supper, but just as he locks it in, Luchasaurus climbs onto the apron, distracting the ref and Darby!
Seizing the moment, Jungle Boy delivers a vicious running knee to the back of Darby’s head! Darby collapses, and Jungle Boy covers!
1…
2…
3!!!
Kevin Kelly: Jungle Boy steals it! Thanks to Luchasaurus, Jungle Boy Jack Perry just picked up the biggest singles win of his career!
Arn Anderson: We may not like the tactics, but it’s hard to argue with the results! What an opening contest here tonight on Chaos!
Winner: ‘Jungle Boy’ Jack Perry
Match Time: 14:55
SEGMENT TWO
We transition to a nighttime establishing shot of a house in a suburban neighborhood, as a car pulls up. As the lights shut off, the doors swing open and Molly Holly and Booker D step out in a hurry. Molly’s face is full of concern, as Booker’s brows are furrowed in frustration.
Booker D: [grumbling] Man, I can’t believe we gotta show up like this. What’s Stevie R been up to, not answering our calls and messages? I know he’s been depressed, but somethin’ ain’t right!
Molly Holly: I agree, it’s not like him to go completely off the grid. We need him now more than ever. This industry is spiraling out of control again. We’ve got the likes of Sami Zayn and Ted Dibiase running amok, and if we don’t stand up—
Molly trails off, looking up at the house, her confidence wavering. They reach the front door and Molly takes a deep breath before knocking sharply. They wait in silence, before she knocks again, more urgently this time.
Booker D: I swear, if he’s just sittin’ in there playin’ video games, I’m gonna—
Suddenly, the door creaks open. Standing there, looking slightly disoriented, is Stevie R, rubbing his eyes like he just woke up from a nap.
Stevie R: [confused] Uh… what are you two doing here?
Molly and Booker exchange a bewildered look.
Molly Holly: Stevie! We’ve been worried sick! We’ve been calling you, texting, emailing—nothing! We thought something happened to you!
Stevie blinks, then shrugs.
Stevie R: I’ve been fine. Just… needed some time. Why are you guys here?
Booker D: [frustrated] Why are we here? Man, the whole industry’s goin’ to hell! Zayn’s runnin’ AEW into the ground, and Dibiase’s got ULW in his back pocket. They’re torturing Splidder! Everything’s outta control! We need you, Stevie!
Molly steps forward, her voice softer but full of urgency.
Molly Holly: Stevie… I know you were thinking about retirement, and if that’s still on your mind, we get it, but we can’t fight this fight alone. Not with things the way they are. We need you, Stevie. More than ever.
For a moment, Stevie looks down, as if contemplating something deeply. Then, to their surprise, a slow smile creeps across his face, but it’s not the Stevie R they’re used to. It’s almost… cryptic.
Stevie R: [calmly] You’re right.
Molly and Booker exchange a stunned look.
Booker D: Wait, we are?
Stevie R: I was wrong to think about stepping away. It’s true, the industry’s in chaos. But not just because of Zayn or Dibiase. No, it’s deeper than that. And we—you, me, and Booker—have a part to play in the war to come.
Booker D: [skeptical] …Stevie, what are you talkin’ about?
Stevie’s eyes drift past them, his expression becoming more intense, as if he’s seen something they haven’t. Suddenly, the camera pulls back, and in the darkened foyer behind Stevie, the faint outline of a figure appears. The dim light from the hallway reveals the eerie, twisted grin of the Boogeyman, lurking in the shadows, his signature worms writhing in his hand.
Molly Holly: [gasping, stepping back] Oh my god—
Booker D: Boogeyman?! What the—
Stevie raises his hand, stopping them both.
Stevie R: Relax. The Boogeyman… he’s opened my eyes. He’s shown me what we need to do. Everything’s about to change, and it starts with us.
The tension in the air is thick, as both Molly and Booker look completely bewildered, unsure whether to trust what Stevie’s saying. The Boogeyman steps forward, his eyes wide, his presence unnerving as always, but Stevie appears completely at ease.
Stevie R: I know this sounds insane, but I’m telling you… Boogeyman has a plan. One that’ll bring order back to the industry. I couldn’t see it before, but now I do. Come inside. Let me explain everything.
Molly shoots Booker a look of hesitance, before Stevie continues.
Stevie R: We don’t have much time. If we’re going to stop what’s coming, we have to act now. Come inside.
There’s a tense silence as Molly and Booker exchange another look. They’re both clearly unsure, but something about Stevie’s conviction convinces them to follow him inside. Slowly, hesitantly, they step inside the house as Stevie motions them forward. The camera lingers on the doorway as they disappear inside, leaving only the unsettling presence of the Boogeyman grinning at the threshold. The door closes with a soft thud, and the scene fades to black.
Match #2 | Knockouts Hardcore Championship
Rhea Ripley w/ Dominik Mysterio vs. Thunder Rosa
The bell sounds and the match begins with the two women standing face to face, Thunder Rosa unafraid despite the fact that Rhea is bigger and stronger in size. Thunder Rosa immediately unloads a barrage of punches, sending Rhea stumbling to the outside.
She wastes no time in launching herself off the apron, taking Ripley down with the apron cannonball! She follows up with a stiff forearm to Ripley’s jaw, but Rhea responds with a boot to her midsection, doubling her over.
Rhea lifts Rosa and slams her down with a body slam onto the outside. She under the ring, immediately grabbing a steel chair. Rosa has rolled back inside, and Rhea follows after her. Rosa catches her with a dropkick to the chest, sending Rhea sprawling and the chair flying.
Rosa quickly grabs the chair and swings it at Rhea’s back—CRACK!—Rhea groans in pain, but it only seems to fuel her. She powers through and snatches the chair from Rosa’s hands, tossing it aside. Big boot to Rosa’s face!
Arn Anderson: Ripley’s built different. Those chair shots? Just waking her up.
Rhea grabs Rosa by the hair and whips her into the corner. She charges, hitting a running clothesline in the corner, then lifts Rosa up for a vertical suplex—holding her in the air for several seconds before dropping her down hard.
She covers Thunder Roa, who kicks out just in the knick of time, as the audience tries to will her back into this thing.
Rhea pulls Rosa to her feet and throws her back outside the ring. She follows, dragging Rosa toward the barricade, but Rosa counters with a jawbreaker! Rhea stumbles back as Rosa grabs a trash can from under the ring and whips it across Rhea’s back! Another shot, and another! Rhea tries to cover up, but Rosa is relentless.
As she’s about to hit Rhea in the head with the trash can, which has been dented and torn up from the previous assault, Dom sneaks up behind her and grabs it. Thunder Rosa turns around, and the crowd pops wildly as she sends Dom flying with the butterfly suplex!
Kevin Kelly: Well, hopefully that will teach him that a Knockouts Hardcore match isn’t his place to interfere!
The interaction with Dom allows Rhea time to recover, as she tosses Rosa back into the ring and follows her in. She grabs the bent up trash can and wedges it between the top and middle turnbuckle. She lifts Rosa for a snake eyes, but Rosa wriggles free, shoving Rhea face-first into the trash can! CLANG!
Kevin Kelly: Rhea’s head bouncing off that steel! Thunder Rosa could turn the tide here!
Rosa quickly grabs a table from under the ring and slides it in. She sets it up near the ropes, then turns her attention back to Rhea. She pulls her up and hooks her for a suplex, but Rhea powers out, slamming Rosa down with a spinebuster onto the mat!
Rhea looks out to Dominik Mysterio, who clutches his Gold Rush Briefcase, ready to assist at a moment’s notice. Rhea gives him a nod and begins to drag Rosa toward the table.
Arn Anderson: You know that table’s not set up for decoration. Ripley’s got something nasty in mind!
Rhea sets Rosa up for a superplex through the table. She climbs to the top rope, but Rosa fights back with stiff elbows to Rhea’s ribs. Rosa slips out and delivers a powerbomb, sending Rhea crashing through the table!
The crowd explodes as Thunder Rosa scrambles for the cover.
1… 2… NO! Rhea kicks out!
Rosa, frustrated, rolls out of the ring and grabs a steel chain from under the apron. She wraps it around her fist and slides back in. Rhea slowly gets to her feet, and Rosa charges—punch to the face with the chain!
Rhea stumbles, blood trickling from her forehead. Rosa winds up for another shot, but Dominik climbs up onto the apron, causing Rosa to pause.
Rosa turns her attention to Dominik, yelling at him to stay out of it. Rhea, meanwhile, recovers and grabs the Gold Rush Briefcase from Dom. As Rosa turns back around, Rhea smashes the briefcase into her skull!
Arn Anderson: And there it is! That briefcase coming into play once more!
Kevin Kelly: That thing has been an ace up their sleeve since he won it back at Starrcade!
Rosa collapses to the mat, and Rhea quickly covers her.
1… 2… 3!!!
Winner: Rhea Ripley
Match Time: 12:45
Rhea Ripley stands tall, holding her Hardcore Championship high above her head. Dominik joins her in the ring, smirking as the crowd boos. Rhea wipes the blood from her face and raises the belt, taunting Thunder Rosa’s fallen body.
Suddenly, Nia Jax’s music hits!
Nia storms down the ramp, eyes locked on Rhea. The crowd erupts as she barrels toward the ring, looking for revenge.
Rhea’s smirk fades as she sees Nia charging toward her. Without hesitation, she grabs Dominik’s hand and the two quickly escape through the crowd, leaving the arena before Nia can get to them.
Arn Anderson: A smart move from Rhea Ripley, who knows that Nia Jax is out for blood!
Nia stands in the ring, staring after Rhea and Dom as they flee up the stairs through the crowd. She raises her fists in the air as the fans cheer her on.
Kevin Kelly: Nia Jax didn’t get her revenge tonight, but I have a feeling this isn’t over between her and Rhea Ripley.
SEGMENT THREE
The scene opens in a photography studio, with the world’s most famous transgender woman standing in front of a massive full-length mirror, admiring all 12-foot of herself as she wears an elaborate wedding dress that looks as if it was crafted by giants. The studio lighting bounces off the sequins as she strikes overly dramatic poses, admiring herself. Her voice, a deep, booming baritone, fills the room as she hums to herself.
Lady Love: Hmmm… this one’s almost perfect, but maybe the lace could be a bit more… fierce.
A scrawny photographer, standing nervously behind his camera, clicks away, sweating bullets as he tries to angle the lens to fit all of Lady Love into the frame. His camera lens fogs up from sheer anxiety.
Photographer: Uh… Lady Love, can we try something a little more… demure?
Lady Love strikes a pose so grand that her arms nearly hit the ceiling, sending the photographer ducking in terror.
Lady Love: [roaring with laughter] Darling, ‘demure’ left the building when I entered! Now focus, before I turn YOU into a centerpiece for this wedding!
Just then, the door to the studio flies open with the force of a battering ram, and in rushes Midget Hogan, her pint-sized lover. He’s in full wrestling gear, complete with his tiny bandana, red and yellow feather boa, and an expression that screams absolute panic.
Midget Hogan: [screaming at the top of his lungs] NOOOOOOO! YOU CAN’T DO THIS, BROTHER!
He charges forward like a mini freight train, eyes wide, foam practically forming at the corners of his mouth. Lady Love stops mid-pose, raising an eyebrow as she watches Hogan leap into the air.
Before anyone can blink, Midget Hogan tackles the photographer, sending the camera flying across the room and knocking over a lighting rig. The photographer yelps as Hogan locks him in a headlock, squeezing with all his might.
Midget Hogan: [shouting maniacally] I WON’T LET YOU MARRY ANYONE ELSE, LADY LOVE! IT’S ME OR NOBODY! I’LL LEG DROP THIS PUNK INTO OBLIVION, BROTHER!
The photographer is gasping for air, his face turning shades of purple as he flails helplessly. Lady Love dramatically clutches her chest, letting out an exaggerated gasp that could rival a soap opera villain.
Lady Love: [voice booming dramatically] OH, MERCIFUL GODDESS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MIDGEY?
Her deep voice shakes the walls as she throws her head back, her enormous form making it look like she’s about to collapse under the sheer weight of her own melodrama.
Midget Hogan: [not letting go of the headlock] YOU CAN’T LEAVE ME, LADY LOVE! WHOEVER THIS SCUMBAG IS, I’LL DESTROY HIM! IT’S YOU AND ME, TILL DEATH DO US PART—WHICH, BY THE WAY, MIGHT BE IN ABOUT 30 SECONDS IF THIS DUDE KEEPS WIGGLING.
The photographer is now making high-pitched squeaking noises, his glasses askew as he weakly taps Hogan’s arm.
Photographer: [wheezing] I’m just… taking… pictures…
Lady Love bursts into thunderous laughter, doubling over as she watches her lover completely lose his mind. With one giant sweep of her arm, she lifts Midget Hogan up off the photographer like he weighs nothing, dangling him in front of her like a small child.
Lady Love: [laughing hysterically] Oh Midgey, you lovable imbecile! You think I’m marrying someone else?! This whole thing’s been for OUR wedding, you ridiculous little man!
Midget Hogan’s eyes widen as the realization hits him. He’s now dangling several feet off the ground, his legs kicking like a child being carried away by his mom in the toy store.
Midget Hogan: [voice squeaking, in shock] Our… our wedding? How’d you know I’d say yes?
Lady Love: I’ve been picking out dresses for us, you maniac! But if you want to take out the photographer, by all means, darling, keep going. I’ll just use the footage as our wedding video.
With Hogan still dangling, she reaches into her bosom and pulls out the diamond ring, placing it in his tiny hands. Hogan stares at it, dumbfounded, as it slowly dawns on him.
Midget Hogan: So, you’re not running off with someone else?
Lady Love: Midgey, if I was running off with someone else, they’d need to be a lot better looking than this dork and hung like a horse, like the man I’m in love with. Now, stop trying to kill the photographer and marry me already!
Midget Hogan, his bravado deflated, looks down at the photographer, who’s now lying flat on the floor gasping like a fish.
Midget Hogan: [looking to the floor] Uh… my bad, sorry about that, brother.
Midget Hogan, still dangling in Lady Love’s grasps, wraps his arms around her as she cradles him effortlessly, moving in for a passionate kiss. Hogan barely has time to react as she plants one on him so hard it nearly knocks his little bandana off.
Midget Hogan: [muffled] Mmmmm—mmmf!!
Photographer: [from the ground] Is this… normal?
Lady Love, not missing a beat, spins around with Hogan still in her arms, holding him up like a champion’s belt.
Lady Love: [laughing loudly] Oh, honey, this is just the beginning! Wait til we ask you back to photograph the honeymoon!
The camera pulls back as Lady Love parades around the studio with Midget Hogan in her arms, kissing him with wild abandon while the poor photographer crawls away for dear life and the scene fades.
Match # 3 | Exhibition Match
‘The Bastard’ Pac vs. Kenny Omega
As the introductions are made, Arn Anderson and Kevin Kelly discuss what we just saw, with Midget Hogan finally accepting Lady Love’s wedding proposal, with his jealously again serving as the catalyst. Switching gears, Arn says Kenny Omega picked up a big win at Aftershock when he defeated his former tag team partner Hangman Adam Page, and tonight he’s looking to keep the momentum going as he takes on the former EWA X-Division Champion, The Bastard Pac!
As the bell sounds, they immediately lock up, both men struggling to gain control. They work their way toward the ropes, tension building as neither wants to give an inch. After a few seconds of struggle, they break apart, shoving each other with intensity.
Kevin Kelly: There’s no love loss between these two men, as they’re meeting for the first time ever here tonight on Chaos.
Omega quickly follows up with a shoulder tackle, sending Pac to the mat. Pac pops up, frustration evident, and the two exchange glares before circling again. They exchange quick passes, trying to outmaneuver each other, before Omega catches Pac off guard with a dropkick to the chest.
Arn Anderson: Kenny Omega’s offense has that snap… everything he does is so explosive, so effective.
Omega wastes no time, hitting a Kotaru Crusher to stun Pac, followed by a Snapdragon suplex, driving Pac across the mat. The crowd pops as Omega, full of momentum, drags Pac to the corner for a buckle bomb, and then immediately plants him with a Sky High powerbomb for a near fall.
Kevin Kelly: Omega’s all over Pac right now. He’s dictating the pace
Arn Anderson: That’s what he needs to do. If you let Pac breathe, he’ll turn the tables before you know it.
Pac, recognizing the danger, rolls out of the ring to create some space. Omega sees the opening and gears up for the Rise of the Terminator dive. With the crowd behind him, Omega sprints across the ring and launches himself through the ropes, connecting with the dive on the outside!
Kevin Kelly: Terminator dive connects! Omega’s taking it to Pac on the floor!
Arn Anderson: He’s gotta get him back in the ring, though. You can’t win it out there.
Omega tosses Pac back into the ring, but just as he steps through the ropes, Pac dropkicks Omega to the barricade with vicious speed, sending him crashing into the steel.
Kevin Kelly: And just like that, Pac’s back in the game!
Arn Anderson: That’s what I’m talking about, Kevin! You give Pac an inch, and he’ll take the whole damn mile.
Back in the ring, Omega struggles to get up. Pac seizes the moment and lands a slingshot cutter, sending Omega crashing to the mat. He covers— 1… 2… NO! Omega kicks out. Pac, undeterred, climbs to the top and hits a missile dropkick, sending Omega sprawling across the mat. Another cover—1… 2… kickout!
Kevin Kelly: Pac’s been absolutely relentless!
Arn Anderson: That’s The Bastard for ya. He smells blood and won’t let up.
Pac drags Omega to the center of the ring, laying in stiff boots to keep him grounded. He then locks in a rear chin lock, slowing the pace, grinding Omega down as the crowd starts to rally behind the Cleaner. Omega fights his way to his feet, throwing wild elbows into Pac’s midsection to break the hold.
Omega creates some separation and fires off a quick push kick, sending Pac into the corner. With a burst of energy, Omega follows up with a barrage of strikes to the body, mixing elbows and punches before going for the cover.
1… 2…! Pac kicks out!
Omega pulls Pac up and nails him with a Fisherman’s Buster, spiking him hard into the canvas. Another cover—1… 2… kickout!
Omega lays in some stinging chops, echoing through the arena. He sets Pac up for You Can’t Escape firemen’s carry, but Pac manages to counter, squirming free. Before Pac can fully regain control, Omega rocks him with a knee strike to the jaw. However, Pac roars back, delivering a devastating lariat, turning Omega inside out.
Arn Anderson: Pac’s not just quick, he’s also a skilled brawler. You give him the chance, and he’ll knock your block off!
With Omega stunned, Pac hoists him up to the top turnbuckle, looking for a big move. The crowd gasps as Pac hits the avalanche falcon arrow from the top rope!
Pac hooks the leg and senior official Michael McMahon drops for the count.
1…
2…
Omega kicks out! Pac keeps him down with a few rapid fire stomps, before ascending to the top rope, lining Omega up for the Black Arrow. He leaps… but Omega moves! Pac crashes and burns, rolling through in agony. Omega, sensing his chance, gets to his feet, screaming for the V-Trigger.
Kevin Kelly: Here we go, V-Trigger locked and loaded!
Omega charges forward, V-Trigger connects flush on Pac’s jaw! He pulls Pac up, looking for the One-Winged Angel, but Pac squirms, fighting out of it. Pac goes for a counter, but Omega rolls him up into a cradle pin!
1… 2… 3!!!
Winner: Kenny Omega
Match Time: 12:00
Omega stands tall, exhausted but victorious, as the crowd erupts in cheers for the intense, hard-fought battle. The camera cuts to the audience, where Hangman Adam Page rises from his seat, a bottle of whiskey in his hand. He claps slowly as the two men exchange glances, and Arn Anderson shouts that we’re out of time!
World Of Wrestling: Murrey Universe 