Midget Quest: An Intro

A Midget Quest with Thomas – An Introduction: Big Win, Big Whoop!

Hi, sorry that you had to wait until we were in the middle of our Monday shows for the current week to hear from me, but I have a lot of stuff to deal with.

Ok, that’s partially a lie. In fact, I was experiencing a bit of what the kids would call a “high” from a plant known popularly as “marijuana”.

Now, I know what may be on your mind in this particular moment: “wait, this isn’t the Thomas we all know and love! Who is this sophisticated fuck?” Well, I assure you – ma’am – that I most certainly am that same Thomas. But, unlike that degenerate in charge of reviewing WWE, I actually attained an education over the years and learned how to properly conduct myself; my late update and public display of marijuana experimentation notwithstanding.

Anyways, let’s get back to it, shall we?

Kicking off Dynamite last Monday was a scene wherein we see clues about Benny ominous return. I thoroughly enjoyed the static effect and the mirage of Benny’s infamous skyline portrait.

After this the show kicks off with a bang as the AEW Champion Logan Paul prepares for his championship celebration. He is interrupted, though, by his former partner in crime and my boss’s former dream boat, MJF. MJF is incensed that Logan seized the moment at Elite Warfare to become the champion at his expense. This is a great feud that we will soon see, but not yet, as Will Ospreay and Adam Page stand in the way of us getting to point B. This will likely stall the big rivalry between Friedman and Paul long enough to make it the feud which closes the season.

All good stuff, though, and I appreciate that the World Title is being treated in such a prized way. Everyone is gunning for it, and Logan knows he is now a marked man!

Next, we see High Minded back to form with their full reunion coming as Lady Love and Midget Hogan return from their Quarter-year honeymoon. A bit of drama unfolds with Riddle bringing up how Midgey skipped the vacation long enough to participate in Elite Warfare, and then everything shifts once Midget Hogan reads aloud that Lady Love has a “love child”.

Now, I love the scandalous aspect of this and it will lead to many great twists and turns in their ongoing saga, but the fact of the matter is that everyone who was watching knows that Lady Love produced – in horror-movie fashion – an offspring with Ric Venom, as it was born in front of the world at UWA Sundown on July 4^th, 2010. So, unless Midget Hogan has found evidence of ANOTHER child, then we aren’t learning anything new except that High Minded may have smoked enough weed to erase significant portions of their wrestling memory. Either way, I’m hooked and ready to see where this goes.

This is followed up by a decent match pitting Toni Storm against Piper Niven. Storm earns a good victory, and we are ready to see our main event for the Television Title. This match was in and of itself a great one, and I was on the edge of my seat the whole time, but I was especially roused to give an applause when Paul Heyman returned to quiet the storm within the Beast Incarnate as he left carnage once he was screwed out of the gold.

Yet, the catch was that Lesnar’s wrath produced an opening for Dominik Mysterio to cash-in his chance at gold (that he earned at Starrcade last June) to secure a quick win for the Television Title, thus ending Gunther’s reign. Not going to lie, as awesome as this was, I would have definitely preferred that he had tried for the AEW Title, but I guess management isn’t quite confident in his ability to carry the company yet.

Finally, the show looks like it is going to conclude, but we have a swerve ending, with some being which is masking itself as Benny and Danhausen simultaneously concluding the show and revealing that Benhausen’s will is for Splinter to return! In lieu of the Sami-Megan regime’s grip, the company has been a rudderless ship, but no more!

I have to say that this was quite the way to end the show, and while I was surprised to see the margin of victory (17,709 viewers separated Dynamite and Aggression), I do believe that AEW delivered a hell of a come back. They have me sitting on the edge of my seat in gleeful anticipation for what’s to come!

As for tonight’s Dynamite (if it happened), we see Splinter’s return, Liv Morgan issuing an open challenge, and MJF squaring off with Ospreay in the main event! If this is another two-match show (which word through the grapevine holds that such is likely going to be the case), then ULW (and WWE?) will have their work cut out for them. I don’t expect Liv to lose her title unless it is to a new debuting big-deal trade from WWE.

In the main event, I see Ospreay pulling out the victory, because MJF is likely sliding into default baby face status as AEW gears him up to be Logan’s primary foe heading into the season finale. As for Splinter, I have no predictions except that he will be a draw for the company, as he always has been.

That’s all for today. Big whoop, wanna fight about it?!