I’ve been toying with some changes to the formatting of my weekly column; I love the classic format of the Mop-Up, but it’s difficult for in-depth analysis with so much wrestling content. Then there’s the 3 R’s of wRestling, but for the first time in literally decades, I truly believe all three major promotions are firing on all cylinders, so it’s difficult if not impossible to find things for the wRong and the Ridiculous categories. So instead, the Mop-Up will evolve into a hybrid of the two columns, foregoing the play by play coverage for a deeper look at the stories that keep us coming back for more!
As a quick aside before we get started, I’d be remiss if I didn’t address what’s been brewing in the AEW with my bosses Benny Mouse and Sami Zayn, and Splinter and the Harlem Turtles. I hate to even call something so serious a “compelling story,” because it’s a man’s real life and health, but the pundits have to agree that this saga is a frontrunner for story of the year so far; and it’s dominated the talk of the wrestling industry now for weeks. That’s no easy feat, and I can’t wait for Sami Zayn’s press conference Monday night to get some long-awaited answers for the accusations Splinter has made. One thing I will agree with my competition (Lenny Mouse) is that the Mouse brothers truly are unstable. Lenny likes to paint himself as the sane, emotionally grounded brother, but after reading his recent column that started with a deranged rap, perhaps he’s on to something calling for the Mouse Brothers to be removed from power (and placed in a mental facility… Lenny included!)
Anyways, enough of that, let’s Mop this shit Up!
WWE:
- Everyone Loves a Mystery: The most compelling wrestling television is when the story leaves us room for a little guess work, and that’s exactly what Jeff Murrey’s Mystery Board of Directors has done. A Gang of Eight only seen until now in the shadows, we’re slowly starting to see a who’s who with the revelation of Jake the Snake Roberts (one of the original Jeff Murrey guys!) and Rowdy Roddy Piper, a legend in his on rights from the independents. With six spots to go, the game now becomes about revealing who they are, and what sort of power Jeff Murrey will allow them to have. Can you imagine one of the eight executives abusing their power to catapult themself to the top of the card? Don’t put it past them, because you’ve gotta believe Jake Roberts is itching for another run, especially seeing his former rival Ted DiBiase get so much screen time in the PWI.
- Cobra Kai Never Dies: What clearly started as a throwaway comedy bit has escalated into one of the most pivotal storylines in World Wrestling Entertainment. Johnny Lawrence was injured, and then he started a GoFundMe to get his life back on track. With two donations (500 from myself and a handful of pesos from The Crock) Lawrence bought fuel for the fire… quite literally, as he torched Ryback’s gym to the ground. Johnny Lawrence will tell us when he’s had enough, and hopefully that’s when he’s crowned the WWE World Champion! Lawrence’s run this era has been unprecedented, and whether he’s given 5 seconds of TV time or 5 minutes, he knows how to make the most of his time and make sure he’s the thing we’re all talking about when the show ends. Good shit.
- Finally… The Rock Has Come Back: To the World Title Scene! The Rock stunned everyone at the Royal Rumble when he defeated Drew McIntyre and Batista to win the WWE Championship… What a wild six weeks The Rock has had, perhaps the most pivotal six weeks of his entire career. He was granted his release from the AEW after doing nothing post-draft, only to show up in the WWE and to reinvent himself. And like Lenny Mouse said, The Rock in minutes made us all believe that he’s the main event. I think what makes this work is that unlike his last run atop in MMouse Enterprises, The Rock is leaning into what we all love most about the character – the attitude, the cockiness, and the charisma. The Rock fired a shot at the other two world champions in the industry, and told the People that he’s their Champion whether the like it or not. Interestingly enough, The Rock did not address Big E, who won the Rumble and earned a title shot presumably at Then Now Forever 2.
- Courthouse Chaos: One of my favorite tropes in all of pro-wrestling is when our cameras take us places they normally wouldn’t go. It’s universally accepted in the business that scenes from a wrestling show can take place LITERALLY ANYWHERE, including in a Court of Law. This week, Doc Brown’s trial kicked off, in which Christopher Lloyd stands accused of not only distributing steroids, but forcing them on WWE talent and celebrities. Now, I’m not 100 percent sure that the Good Doc’s elixir is actually anabolic steroids, although the evidence seems to disagree with me here. I could see a major twist, and it wouldn’t shock me if Brown’s dosing Flex Fuller, Ryback, and MJF *Michael J Fox* with cocaine to bring out their best… I’m not sure that that’s any better, but I’m saying, it’s the WWE and anything can happen. We didn’t get a verdict during the segment on Raw, and the following night on NXT the ever charismatic Flex Fuller collapsed during a flex-off after clutching his chest. Now, I know the people will be quick to point fingers at the Doc, but until I have more information, I’m not about to start pointing fingers… instead I’ll continue to pray for Flex Fuller’s full recovery.
- Don’t Sleep on GUNTHER: While the drama with Johnny Lawrence, Doc Brown, and the Rock’s promo took a lot of the attention this week, I wanted to be the first to note that GUNTHER is the future of the brand. He’s quietly working his way through the roster as the reigning and defending WWE European Champion and this week he put on a clinic with Batista. GUNTHER was a great acquisition to the WWE following the 2023 Draft, and he pops out as a man who means business in a sea of hilarity. GUNTHER WILL be the WWE Champion sooner or later, and I’d pay top dollars to see him clash with The Rock down the line!
Predictions for the week to come:
- I’m not stupid, I know it’s a fool’s errand to try and predict what’s coming next in Jeff Murrey’s WWE, because frankly, the man has perfected the art of unpredictable story telling. Lenny Mouse seems to think Murrey’s booking is insane and without a plan, but if I know Murrey like I think I know him, there’s a greater story he’s telling in the chaos. This week I’m hoping to see advancements in the saga between Murrey’s Misfits and Johnny Lawrence, and I’m hoping to see Big E start his build towards the world title match. It’d also be nice to get an update on Beth Pheonix, who laid the ground work at the Rumble for a future match with WWE Women’s Champ Asuka.
PWI:
- The Rise of the Young Bucks: When PWI acquired the Young Bucks after their shocking (albeit very brief) run in the EWA, it was no secret that we were looking at future PWI Tag Team Champions. This past Monday night, after securing a future title shot by drawing with Teo and Attitude on a live show, the Bucks finally captured the gold after the original tag title unification match was changed after the IIconics worked out a deal with Shane McMahon. The Ladder War was honestly the match of the night, and the Bucks came from out of nowhere to capture the gold. This sets up the obvious feud between the Bucks and the Attraction, which in my opinion is the biggest match they can do in the tag division at this time, but with Teo and Attitude in the Six Pack Challenge Monday, I think the Bucks will have a side feud with FTR in the mean time. Nothing against Mr. & Mr., they’ve been a fine addition to the division as a comedy act, but they’re just not believable contenders in a division with the Bucks, FTR, Beer Money, and the Attraction. (They’d fair a lot better as a top act in the HCW, if that company were a real organization with their own belts, that is.)
- Becky’s Buddy: In the brief time AJ Lee spent as an on-screen character, we watched her briefly obsess over Athena Star before she was hired by the PWI. Since then, the gimmick has continued as she’s obsessed over Becky Lynch, the top women’s act in the PWI. Meanwhile, Charlotte Flair has risen to prominence and has flourished under the MMouse Enterprises banner, and she’s my choice to win the Premier Athlete Tournament. That said, Flair’s quest for gold was sidetracked as AJ Lee helped her friend Becky retain; and a quick look at the brackets shows it very well could be Lee and Charlotte in the finals, assuming Lee can get past Alexa Bliss. And if she doesn’t, I assume Bliss wins the tournament and we get to Charlotte’s next title shot AFTER she gets through AJ Lee. The division is stacked, and they’re doing their all to best the Knockouts Division as the premier women’s division in the industry.
- The War Grows, and Dissent in the Ranks: I asked for weekly advances to the major storylines, and the PWI delivered. This week, we got to see some dissent in the ranks as Ted Brown was forced to justify his actions last week when he helped Dragonfly retain to Scott Nash, Blaster, and Catherine. Brown rightfully pointed out that Blaster and Catherine really don’t have too much skin in the game, so to speak, as they’ve only helped Brown and Nash by proxy and aren’t at risk of losing their promotion (since they technically don’t have one…) It’s my prediction that the Global Conflict series ends with PWI and HCW’s death, with Blaster & Catherine ready to pick up the scraps to form a new promotion for next summer’s season. That said, we got a wildcard addition to the mix as Ted DiBiase declared the Million Dollar Corporation’s involvement. I’ll admit, I wanted to see Dragonfly pin FRED in a matter of seconds after DiBiase offered, but sources tell me PWI was too afraid to pull off that swerve. Had Dragonfly defected, the HCW’s point would have been taken away, and the Million Dollar Corporation would emerge as a legitimate threat with the Undisputed Champion in their ranks. That said, I suppose there’s still plenty of time to legitimize the Million Dollar Corporation as a player in the war, and I can even imagine a scenario in which DiBiase is working with/for Catherine and Blaster to help lay the groundwork for what comes post-PWI.
- The Momentum Shifts: MMouse Enterprises has always been at its best when they’ve got steady and direct competition. Since the new year, PWI has felt like a motivated company with a sense of direction. It’s a shame it took til the literal final stretch of the company’s history to get here, but right now they’re riding a wave of momentum of improved shows. The ratings gap is closing, and with the back to back Global Conflict 1 and the Final Showcase, it just feels like a more motivated roster that’s resulting in a better product. In the past I’ve picked at the company for it’s pacing issues, and while there’s still a few tweaks to make, it’s hard to deny the pacing has gotten better. Hell, they even tossed The Crock into a random backstage segment with the mid-ratings players the IIconics in a move that helped Royce and Kay score what’s likely the highest rated promo of their career. I just want to commend the company on the improvements, because they’re not lost on me. If this keeps up, we may FINALLY see a first place ratings victory from the boys down south! (Also, props to the callout from Matt Cardona; I’ve got it on good authority that Cardona’s having a VERY good week, but I can’t get into that now.)
- One, Two… Bray’s Coming For You!: We saw the long-awaited return of The Fiend Bray Wyatt this week, when he arrived to finish the feud with The Demon Finn Balor. Though the match itself wasn’t a 5 Star Classic or anything, it didn’t need to be and it worked as the Final Showcase’s penultimate match. As The Fiend stood tall, we heard him call out for “MICKEY!” just as the segment concluded. Mickey and Bray have a rich history, and Mickey may very well be kicking himself for betraying Wyatt previously. I can envision a scenario in which Mickey wins the conflict only to have Wyatt end his career (and/or life) once and for all!
Predictions for the week to come:
- Matt Cardona is set to square off against Mystico on Monday in the Premier Athlete Tournament, and I’m calling a Cardona victory here. Cardona’s been slotted into the cocky heel role that previously belonged to Austin Theory; but unlike Theory, Cardona’s got the accolades from his time in HLW and WWE to his bragging rights, and the character works just as well as it ever did for Theory. The PWI loves a cocky heel who can back it up in the ring (See: Dragonfly) and Cardona is just that! Elsewhere, I’m predicting that Slammer (who is ranked #1 in the ratings, presumably for hitting Nikki Cross in the face and sending her flying from the rafters…) picks up the upset in the Six Pack Challenge, and will continue on to challenge Dragonfly, who’s in a midst of beating off (phrasing!) all the monster challengers before he inevitably circles back to Randy Orton.
Monday on Dynamite:
- Sami Zayn will take questions from the press (these questions can be submitted ahead of time as a comment on this post in the World of Wrestling FB Group) for the first time since Splinter’s revelation about Benny’s health.
- The Phenomenal AJ Styles will address the shocking betrayal from The American Dragon Bryan Danielson
- We’ll hear from Miss Athena Star for the first time since her victory over Angelina Love two weeks ago.
All this and so much more as we prepare for another wild week in the World of Wrestling! DAMN I LOVE MY JOB!
World Of Wrestling: Murrey Universe 